More to Me Than HIV

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More to Me Than HIV

First published in Gscene July 2020 For last years World AIDS Day I put together a public project of work joining other people living with an HIV+ diagnoses at Jubilee library.For last years World AIDS Day I put together a public project of work joining other people living with an HIV+ diagnoses at Jubilee library. For the project I spoke openly about my journey having being           Read more

More to Me Than HIV: GScene post Aug 2020

More to Me Than HIV is a project that aims to breakdown the stigma that has historically been attached to this virus.  When I saw my piece in last months Gscene to promote the More to Me Than HIV project, I was extremely proud, but a small part of me was filled with anxiety; but why should I feel this way? I have been on effective antiretroviral therapy since the Read more

More to Me Than HIV: first published in GScene July 2020

For last years World AIDS Day I put together a public project of work joining other people living with an HIV+ diagnoses at Jubilee library. For the project I spoke openly about my journey having being             diagnosed HIV+ 32 years previous. Back then there was no treatment and a lot of fear and misinformation concerning how HIV was transmitted. As such stigma was rife, Read more

A-Z of Horror

J is for Janice

J is for Janice

Janice By Juile

Janice By Juile

From the day she was born, Janice was given everything she wanted. She didn’t need to cry for too long before either her doting father or loving mother would be at her side, fussing over her with reassuring words of comfort and kisses on her forehead. From this moment on Janice knew that she was a very special person and because of that she could have what ever she wanted.

As a child she would demand the attention of the other children and to a degree, their parents too. Only a very few adults would see that when Janice acted sweetly, she was actually manipulating the situation for her own needs. When in sight she could be seen as being kind and gentle, but when the backs were turned she would be able to pinch and blame a wasp sting, steal and blame another child for the misdemeanour with frightening clarity and conviction. After a while some of those children learnt not to play with Janice, while others felt no other option but to take the blame.

Janice was never into killing animals, but when she met Nick, a senior boy, she was more then happy to guide him into committing such crimes. the very first time was after wining a gold fish at the funfair. Taking themselves off to a quieter  part of the park, Janice egged Nick on to tip the goldfish out on to the grass and together they watched it flap and gasp and flip and eventually die. After then Janice allowed Nick to go to third base.

Once Nick understood the rewards that could be gained from such actions he gladly explored ways of trapping other animals and bringing their lives to an end, always of course with Janice encouraging him to commit the crime with a promise of a treat straight afterwards.

After a while killing animals lost its appeal fro Janice an din turn for Nick too. Janice found that Nick had become too good at trapping animals or coaching them from peoples gardens and so they needed something more tangible, something closer to home to bait. And so Janice suggested her parents, the ones who had created such a monster with their smothering love and unquestionable believe that their little girl was nothing but perfect.

Now this project needed much more planning if they were to get away with murder, they would need someone to take the fall, while they made there escape. And so it was down to Janice to make friends with a lad who was new to town.

It didn’t take long for Janice to work her charm and within a few hours Janice, Nick and their new best friend, Jason were at Janice’s parents house, drinking from her father’s drinks cabinet, Janice and Nick secretly supping soft drinks while encouraging Jason to knock back another whiskey and coke.

Once Janice had Jason nicely inebriated, she stared to tell Jason how her parents were monsters who from a young age had treated her badly, kept her locked in the cupboard under the stairs, forced her to eat a meal that she had not been able to to stomach from the night before which would be reserved for breakfast, lunch and dinner.

As with all of Janice’s victims they fell under her spell and vowed to help her in any way they could.

As Janice’s mother was the main protagonist in Janice’s misery it was decided that she should feel the most pain. Much to Nick and Janice’s delight it was Jason who suggested poisoning her tea. His father had some stringent stuff in his shed that they could slip in to Janice’s mother’s tea and together they could watch her demise. As for the father that was easy too, slashing the brake cables on his car would do the trick, but they were all sad to know that they would only be able to wave him off and hear about his death later.

On both occasions the plan worked, and as an added bonus they were able to lay all the blame at Jason’s door. no matter how much he protested otherwise Janice was able to convince all who talked to her that they had tried to befriend Jason but it quickly became cler to her that he was a bad lot and as revenge he had killed her loving parents. Of course no one believed Jason’s story about Janice’s parents being monsters and so he was locked away fro everyones safety.   

and so began Janice an Jason’s long murderous career. Of course their crimes caught up with them eventually, with perhaps the most notorious being the modern day trunk murder which can be read in many true crime books and even found itself rewritten as fiction in the book, Blanche Street: where all the neighbours are a nightmare.       

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I is for Impossible

I is for impossible.

757ebca39a183a207ddaebe1503b7da0Having blown out her one hundred candles, with a slight relieve that her dentures didn’t come flying out covering the butter icing, Alice was quite exhausted and glad to be back in the solitary of her room, where she lit up a stogie and sat back in her chair.

As much as everyone had made a great fuss over her centenary birthday, with just as many making ‘ohh’ and ‘ahhh’ noises over her best wishes from the queen, Alice was not so fussed. In all her years nothing had compared to the magic of that one summer when she was just a girl, sitting in the garden, listening to her sister reading.

After her great adventure, falling down the rabbit hole and all the people she had met, she had honestly thought, hand on heart that her adventures would have been greeted with the same passion as she had felt, but alas this was not the case.

When Alice tried to explain that what she was telling her peers was real, this only made everyone around her more concerned for the young girls mental health. When she refused to admit it was all part of her imagination, her peers got angry and said she needed to be shut away for her own good. And so for the next ninety-three years Alice lived her life behind the great wall of Jupiter Hills Institution for the Mentally Insane. Not that that was what the place is called these days; successive management teams had come and gone, each adding their own view on how the inpatients should be cared for but more importantly how the institution was viewed by the outside world. These days the place on top of the hill is simply called, “Jupiter: Where We Care to Care.”

Alice would have liked to protest over such sentiments, but she learnt a long time ago that such acts of defiance only led to electrodes, isolation and beatings.
When she first arrived she longed to find a cake to eat or a drink to drink, to transform and escape this madness.

Her obsession with food and drink led to a frightening disorder which led to being force fed, a particular horrible experience which went on for many years. Now of course everything is liquidised and fed directly in to Alice’s stomach and Alice no longer has the fight to fight back.Forcefeeding

And so, back in her windowless room, where suppression of natural stimulants are all part of Alice’s “care to care” package which for decades had been, as far as the powers that be were concerned, a great success. Although it took a lot of punishment, otherwise know as conversion therapy, eventually Alice’s spirit of th imagination was broken and eventually they have cured Alice of talking about her delusional dreams.

Although Alice stopped speaking wonders from that summer day, she just had to close her eyes, as she did everyday at three and let her imagination bring everyone back into sharp focus.

And so Alice settled down in her chair, the only other furniture in the room was a bed, and waited for the ticking noise to fill her head, only this time the ticking sounded different, louder, outside of her head, filling her room.
Afraid to believe it was true, Alice kept her eyes firmly shut until the ticking became so loud that it was quite impossible for it to be just inside her head.
First Alice opened her left eye, then her right and then shut them tightly shut again as she processed the sight of the white rabbit standing in the middle of her gloomy room. Again Alice was too afraid to open her eyes as she realised the wish that for so long she had held tight had at last come true.
Alice jumped as a slight touch was felt on her knee. This time her eyes sprang open wide and their stood the rabbit, standing by the rabbit hole with his , pocket watch in hand. Although Alice had wizened beyond all recognition of her youth, the rabbit recognised he right away, held out his palm and said, ‘It’s Time. Let’s get out of here, let’s go on an adventure’.

 

 

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